<3

Crazy.....

2005-12-17T12:35:00.000-08:00

life has been pretty boring lately.... work, home... work, home...
i think that it's time i need to catch up with all my frens.... i'm sorriee bern for always having to say NO to all ur invitations... because of WORK... sigh... and after work i'm just simply too tired to think abt anything else except abt my cosy bed.. WORK is a killer...
however no matter how much i whine, i still love FISH & Co... ha ha...

ok... ok... abt my crush.. oopss... i think it's increasing... haha... but no matter wat, i still love my baby.... hee...
sadly, yest CRUSH was on leave... so missed CRUSH.... yeah i know i'm crazy lah... but who cares... haha... =)
because that's ME!!!!

MAY, i just wanna say that i love ya gal... you're really so sweet ok... always remembering to msg me despite the fact that i hardly reply... sorriieee... really owe u a thousand apologies.... and PREM, i really miss hanging out with ya... We must ok... i know that i'm the busy one lah but i hope that u'll have time to spare me when i'm free... haha... (evil laugh)- afraid that u mite be busy with ur special one... =)
and yeah BERN too.... havent seen ya for such a long long time... =(

and Jacq is also working at parkway parade.. at TOPSHOP... cool man... haha... but i'm glad cause we don't contact each other but we will always get a chance to say hi and bye to each other.... now i really miss school... Council... 2A1...

WORK at 6pm later... how lazy am i... :p

I'M BACK!!!

2005-12-14T13:30:00.000-08:00

hmmmm my last update was exactly 2 weeks back.... haha... wat to do!!! i'm a busy gal... haha
and i'm updating today cause firstly, baby had been constantly nagging at me to.. and secondly i'm on leave today...

oh my.. i really love my job at Fish & Co.... really do.... i have passed thru the training period and i'm really doing my best cause they are pretty strict where service standard is concern... and i love my colleagues too... haha.... except for.... (evil laugh)... baby will know this.... haha
and i really embarassed myself when i like slipped and fell infront of so many ppl when i was about to serve the food cause someone mopped the floor... and ended having a swollen body... but i acted strong lah... haha... the customers were really sweet...
and i have this crush on someone... it's a nice feeling... haha...
(told baby already.. haha... so not guilty of anything)
baby thank you for the sweet surprise yest.... really do love ya lotsa... =)

I really MISSSSSS all My Frens... havent got the time to catch up with them... =(
and MAY thanks for ur sweet msg... haha... you'll always be remembered ok.... i'll never ever forget you... and Prem... hope everything's ok.... and i do miss ya too gal...

and i'm really.. really very tired... but not working gives me this empty feeling... haha...

Happiness

2005-12-01T21:00:00.000-08:00

hmmmmm abt updating....it's kinda weird that when i was having exams i felt and cldn't resist the urge to blog but now... kinda lost that urge already and the strange part is that i'm SO free now... but i'm just getting too lazy... so i really need a JOB!!!
ha ha.....

on mon it was TWINKX Birthday so we headed to our origin-SENTOSA..haha... it was fun, great, awesome and lovely.....
it so amazing how we got to know each other and how far our friendship have come...
just wanna say that I LOVE U GUYS!!!!

and i just heard a very very happy news.... and i just wanna say CONGRATULATIONS to that special someone... =)

i just wanna tell baby that I LOVE YOU.... maybe i dont say it often but you're really my dingdong too... haha... =)

WAQT

2005-11-26T21:40:00.000-08:00

wondering wat my heading means???
it's TIME in hindi...
hmmm just watched a hindi movie by that title... the movie which made me cry real lotsa...
it's a great but sad movie...
do catch it if possible....
it's all about the race agst time and the love btw a dad and a son...

hmmm went for council gathering today... had lotsa fun though Prem and I arrived really really late.. sorriiee guys....
really hope for another real soon and hope that everyone will be present...

i just wanna say sorry to someone.... i know that i made ya real mad but the least you can do is reply to my msges.... and i'm gonna leave ya alone till then....

2005-11-24T23:35:00.000-08:00

i never knew that it was so painful....
it's killing me!!!!
the tot abt loving that person for 16 mths..
the memories.....
this person will always be precious to me.....

THANKS!!!

2005-11-24T19:00:00.000-08:00

wanna thank this special someone who has been a very impt person in my life... i dont know wat more to say.... but all i can say is that i'm hurting deep within.... i cant believe your words and i can take it no more.... maybe to u, they all mean nothing... but to me they say a million words....
so yeah thanks for everything thus far...
just wanna wish u all the best in ur life...
i hope i made the rite step....

so yeah today marked the end of my a-levels examination..... i'm suppose to be happy... very happy... but sad to say that i'm not at all happy or even in the mood to party...
i had lotsa fun with Prem and Elaine today... i'm really thankful for such wonderful frens.... i really love u guys lotsa...

and i guess that i have lotsa of catching up with frens to do... ppl who i have lost contact with but never gave up on me...
and the twinkx.... i really miss ya guys... love ya too guys...

NOTICE!!!!

2005-11-21T09:00:00.000-08:00

First.. i'm back.. ha ha... it's not really a big deal actually.... just love making myself sound impt... ha ha... kidding... :p

second... countdown to the end of my a's: 3 days...
FINALLY!!!! the day i'm waiting for is really coming soon...
i'm really tired of studying... VERY...
hmmm my papers have been ok so far... hope everything will go well...
all i can say is that i did my best.... =)

and today i went for lunch with my galfrens... had lotsa fun of course... when do i never have fun rite.. haha... hmmmm talked abt working... working and a lot more abt working.. till our dear Ms Elaine was so ready to go back and look for a job... oh my.. a's are not even over rite... haha....
hmmmm i'm really glad that things are well again... let's treasure our frenship ok.... =)

and today after hist paper... i heard a scary news...ha ha... which actually made me laugh... cant believe it man.... oh my... seriously....

ok..ok... will be back after thus i think... haha
and i'm so angry at baby now.... =(

NEVER!!!

2005-11-01T20:40:00.000-08:00

i'll never understand what you're really feeling... but i promise to be there for ya always...
*hugs*

hmmm let's see... went over to prem's place for Deepavali today... it was great fun... went with elaine and bern... missed them so much... so it was a great 'catching up' session too...
Elaine is forever the cute gal she is... and as for Bern, the sophiscated gal.... i would say... but she's weird... cause for the Othello play she wore like she was going TM and today, quite glam... but i still love her... haha
and Prem, the host, haha... she was gorgeous... and i just loved her green top... haha... guess i wanna get it too... =)
(might wear that for clubbing at KL)
early planning it seems... haha

went shopping with b yest.... i never fail to enjoy myself when i'm with b... so yeah wont elaborate more... :p

countdown to the start of my a's: 9 days.... SCARY!!!!
i guess i need all the luck i can get now.... =)

PS: ppl who love tagging ridiculous qns... it'll be great to leave your name maybe if u really wanna know the ans... oh wait a min.... i think that i'm not required to tell you more abt my personal life... =)

2005-10-28T20:00:00.000-07:00

GROW UP!!!!
i think those are the best words for me now....
i'm gonna stop all that reliance and i hope that it'll make u happy...

and yeah i hope that my brains wont die on me... on the day of my exams... at the rate i'm going....
i think that i'm really starting to hate my life now....

2005-10-27T02:00:00.000-07:00

when life no longer holds any purpose....
i'm tired....
my mind's in a mess...
what do i want???

=)

2005-10-26T21:15:00.000-07:00

=) + =(

2005-10-26T21:10:00.000-07:00

dont really know wat to update abt actually...
life has been pretty cruel to me lately...
with all the last min studying... like a mad person... ok ok.. not to that extent yet... =)
so yeah 2 more weeks for the start of my a's... and 1 mth for its ends....
*screams* HELP!!! SAVE ME!!!

apart frm that.... i still have my tiny bit of fun...
on mon and tues, met baby... to buy b's pants on day one and my pants on day two... haha... had lotsa fun... def... at least baby is smiling and all... really glad for that.. =)
and today i went out with Prem.... really missed that gal... and we had tonnes of fun... ha ha... doing invitation cards at the bus stop when we cld have done it at lj.. haha... weirdos lah we... but we love being weirdos rite prem???
and i'm really gonna miss her once a's are over.. cause we wont like be meeting every monday to friday rite... sigh... =(
and bern, where are you??? oh where are you???

it's just so hard to say good-bye...
=(

Even Though.....

2005-10-16T20:52:00.000-07:00

it has been a while since the 17th stepped down... but.... i really miss you guys lotsa...
read prem's blog... nearly made me tear... haha...
wat to do... i think that those memories will never die...
it's just impossible....
why did i join council???
it's so hard to let go now... it's so hard to say good-bye yeah...
i never expected myself to be so close to all this ppl who were once just strangers to me...
but ties were built so fast... so fast that i didnt even realise at all...
we had all those ups and downs.. we fell... we "hated" each other... but at the end of the day, on investiture, no matter how strong each individual was, we did break down a way or another...
for me, i actually cried... i guess no matter how much i deny, i really love SRJC 17th STUDENT COUNCIL lotsa... =)
and guys i just wanna wish each and every one of ya all the best for a-levels... =)

THANKS....

2005-10-13T21:25:00.000-07:00

i'm just feeling miserable.... and the story goes on......

my Life......

2005-10-08T19:35:00.000-07:00

My Love, My Life

You have always been there
When I needed someone,
When I needed a friend.
When I made a mistake,
You always let it slide,
As if you didn't take notice of it.
I don't know how I can thank you
Or love you enough
For all you've done for me,
For all the love you've given me,
While expecting nothing in return.
Your patience with me has been so great,
Probably greater than
It ever should have been.
But am I ever glad,
Ever so glad.
There's nothing I'd much rather do than
Share my life with you.

My friends-Prem, Elaine, Bern, May, Kavee mean a lot to me too... =)

and yeah read prem's blog... really wanna thank Alfred and the rest for kinda 'waking us up' and making us realise how much our frenship means to both of us... i'm really glad that we managed to work things out... ha ha... remembering those times... now i think that our arguments were rather silly... ha ha... werent they Prem???
but really, thank you...Prem, for everything thus far... love ya lotsa gal...

Shaz, Yan, Isyah, Dee and Widya too mean a lot... =)
love them all...
never did i ever think that i'll actually be part of this... hee... i really love this frenship that we have cause it's really special... =)

i'm really glad to have all these ppl in my life..
def not forgetting my parents... =)

i hate myself....

2005-10-07T19:35:00.000-07:00

got back my prelim results and it's atrocious... i'm kinda depressed...
i've only got myself to blame for not working hard enough....
why am i so stupid???
why cant i just reach my target??
why am i so lazy???
why cant i just 'wake up' and realise that i've only got 30 days more????
haiz.... i really dont know wat more to do....
why do i feel so so sad deep within when ppl say that it's not worth crying over spilt milk... asking myself whether am i gonna let this repeat for a levels???
i just i cant afford to feel that way.... i dont wanna disappoint my parents... i wanna do well...
ok.. ok... enough of that.... i'm just breaking down deep within....

hmmmm let's see... i had a great day today... met baby finally... didnt do much but the time spent together was great... i guess it's the simple things in life that really makes one happy...i'm very happy...

yeah i know that i just contradicted myself... but who cares.....

hmmm i was just wondering...
if that person can 'bitch' abt someone to you, wat makes u so sure that person cant do the same abt you to another person???
i guess that it's all abt human nature.... humans being competitive..selfish...
i think that it'll really crush me to see/hear someone close to me actually doing that to me...
but i cant be that bad rite... ha ha...
but watever it is, i really cant be bothered if ppl wanna be hypocrites...
so yeah.... lets just snap out of that mood....

the result....

2005-10-05T20:15:00.000-07:00

it's time for reality to sink in...
hmmm i'm really very happy for ya... you've got wat you wanted and wished for.. =)
but the result really came too fast... and i'm just a bit shocked... ha ha...
but you can do it ok.. all the best... =)

hmmmm school was great today.. and Mrs Kok was being very sweet today.. ha ha.. gave us a collar pin.. which wrote I CARE... it's really sweet actually and all this make me wonder wat all the others say...
but i wld say that it meant a lot actually...=)
and i will miss school lotsa...

today was the final day in school for Mr Singh... only will be away for one yr... haha... the way we make it sound is like forever... said our final goodbye... hmmm really gonna miss him lotsa... all his sarcasm..... lame jokes... and lit lessons... sigh... wish him all the best once again... =)

is it scary to love????

2005-10-03T21:30:00.000-07:00

personally... loving and being loved is great... but the separation part is really scary yeah....
i guess that it actually depends on the cause of separation...
so personally, in my case i think it'll be painful yeah...
but let's not think abt that now ok..ha ha...

hmmm lets see... today was the first time i felt really close to elaine.. ha ha... maybe it's the first we really talked on the personal area.. hee.. if not, it's always abt school... i think... hee...
really loved the time i spent with my two dearies-elaine and prem today... had lotsa fun...
and elaine must listen to prem's and my advice ok!!!!! hee...

oh yeah i cant believe that PREM act finds the music teacher in Shooting Star cute!!!
not taufik... but that "old" teacher... ha ha... PREM is WEIRD... heeeeee......
so i decided to find out how many act really do find that teacher cute... ha ha... the PREM's special group... ha ha..

My dearies....=)

2005-10-02T19:55:00.000-07:00

let's see what have i been doing for the past few days...
def not studying at all ok... sigh... feeling so guilty but yeah promised myself that i'll start on mon...

i know that you care for me... but at times i do need my freedom and space ok... i mean come on, you were away for 3 days... and during that 3 days, lotsa happened... i did my part ok so stop saying that i didnt do anything and all i wanna do is have fun...
and come on lah, i wldnt have taken this step if all i wanted was to fail... HELLOOOO, i'm scared and worried too ok... but it doesnt mean that my life is just going to be abt studying.... i dont wanna end up in IMH... so stop telling me wat to do when i know wat i'm suppose to do.. GIVE ME A BREAK!!!!
(and the best part is that you dont even know wat i'm feeling deep within, so just stop acting like you know it all and that i'm happy... cause i'm not...)

let's just get away from that mood ok.. ha ha..
hmmmm on sat i went for the SCDF career seminar... it was really interesting... got me thinking of joining it... ha ha.. actually i dont mind... if i do, then the Paramedic area will be my kind... ha ha...
the best part was the dialogue session cause one of the officer was cute man... ha ha.. and his voice.... wow... love it... ha ha....
ok ok.. lets snap out of that...=)
today, it's was indoor Sports Day... went bowling... played pool... ha ha... it was so so so fun...
so my dearies were my baby, shaz and yan... we had lotsa fun... and shaz's reactions were super cute during the bowling... ha ha..
cant wait for more to come...

hmmm and tmr, it's school time.. and i'll be meeting my other dearies... Prem, Elaine, Bern, May.... =)
miss them all and they are the ones who make school fun for me... =)

can money buy true love???
at times, do wonder abt it... ha ha...

Reality

2005-09-28T21:10:00.000-07:00

wished everyday cld be like yest....
swimming.... having so much fun....=)
but yeah happy times dont last forever...
it's back to Reality.... STUDY!!!STUDY!!!!STUDY!!!

wat's sacrificing 35 days of your life to have a bright future???
(35 days more to A-levels)... PHEW time flies...
having no distractions..... Actions speak louder than Words!!!
i admit that i cant and wont be able to do w/o my hp... haha..
i'm not the kind who can wait for 1 hour, finish studying then reply...
for me, put my books aside straightaway and reply... ha ha
Aiyoh!!! how to pass like that....
ALL I CAN SAY NOW IS THAT I'LL DO MY VERY BEST OKIE!!!! =)

and i miss the girls already.... =)
(cant wait for KL)
miss baby.... =)
(cant wait to go shopping)
miss Prem....=)
(cant wait to see her in school tmr... and the card too!!!)

Decisions......

2005-09-23T18:30:00.000-07:00

first prelims are over... yipee..... Finally...
but there's still A-levels awaiting me... ha ha...
haiz... it's more like i'm awaiting it's arrival... but i'm not even prepared...
TIME TO REALISE THAT A-LEVELS DOESNT WAIT FOR ANYONE....
esp after wat my teacher told me today... need to work harder... kinda spoilt my day... wished that i cld meet b but b was busy.. so yeah.... it's ok...

decisions are so easy to make and so hard to follow rite...
no matter wat decisions i made regarding our relationship when we argue, i just cant follow it cause i just wanna tell ya that you mean a lot to me...
i just hope that hist wont repeat itself cause i dont know how i'm going to undergo another emotional 'battle'... ha ha...
b, i just wanna say that no matter wat happens, you'll always have a special place in my heart... and i really love ya lotsa baby... =)

and yeah,just wanna thank prem for everything...the time spent with ya today, though short, it was great... hee

and today i realised how much i missed the councillors..we had lotsa fun today...we are and will always remain crazy.. ha ha...
i really miss ya guys so much.. and yeah this was our last gathering but hope that our frenship will never end ok... love 17th Student Council always...
and i just wanna say that Mr Singh's short farewell speech was so sweet lah.. so unlike him... ha ha... and i wont forget wat he said abt the 17th SC... thank you Mr Singh... hee....

that's all for today... and i wanna change my layout but need the genius Yan to help me... heeeeee.....

Wat is it that i REALLY want???

2005-09-20T20:40:00.000-07:00

the ans is i, myself dont even know....
pass my a-levels???
go to uni???
live my life the way i want to live it???
making others happy and not myself????

i really, really wish that i can live in my own world... where stress doesnt exist.... and not having to worry on disappointing others esp my parents at the end of the day.... and not having to worry that there's no future for you if you dont study well... all that stupid sort of mentality...
and after studying it's time to work...
JUST HOW GREAT LIFE IS YEAH??
is that really what ppl wanna do.... OR is it because there's no other choice for them, because the definition of living life is already written for you and you cant change it cause if you do then you're cheating and depriving yourself of a "good" life....

is life all about being the best???
that you cant even spend a min away from your books and assignments cause if not others will "catch up" with ya and you'll be labelled the LOSER!!!
is this the only thought left on all parents' minds today???

i totally have to agree that advancing is great... modernising is great... competition is beneficial... but i do envy the old times where children lived their childhood days to the fullest....

wat can i say????

2005-09-18T19:50:00.000-07:00

life has been pretty hectic for me....
studying for prelims.. and lotsa of other things too.. which i wont say anything abt..

yest went for Izyan's bbq.... it was fun.... yipee!!!!!!
A YEAR OLDER GAL... hee...
may you always be HAPPY!!!!
love ya gal... hee

today it's our 14 mths.. wow, that's long... hee... and we may had our ups and downs but i really do treasure everything that i have... you mean a lot.. and hope that everything will go fine... may we have lotsa happy mths to come...

and prem thanks for everything... miss ya gal..

Birthday Girl.... =)

2005-08-28T21:05:00.000-07:00

hmmmm firstly, i wanna wish Bern and myself...
Happy 19th Birthday... ha ha....

My birthday wish: to PASS my A-Levels with Flying Colours... =)

and yeah didnt do much... it's just like every year... which means not celebrating it.. ha ha...

yest went to sentosa with pat,wazzy,sofi,ayn.... had lotsa fun though didnt do much... i was the photographer for the day... then went to have lunch with ayn at PS... and manage to do a little window-shopping...

i'm so waiting for my surprise gift from dear... ha ha..

FUN.....

2005-08-22T21:00:00.000-07:00

thought that i will do this too...
since i dont know wat to update actually.. ha ha...
*copied from baby's blog*

Which one of your CLOSEST FRIENDS [is]:-

The Loudest? - ELAINE TENG.. hee hee...
The Quietest? - NONE!
The Smartest? - PREMANI, KAVEE
The Not-So-Smartest? - NONE, AGAIN!
The Tallest? - I'M... ha ha...
The Shortest? - LETs SEE... I think it's ELAINE.. ha ha...
The Weirdest? - BERNADINE and MAY
The Funniest? - ALL THE ABOVE... at diff times...
The Most Fun To Hang Out With? - ALL MY FRIENDS!!!!
Just Doesn't Care About Anything? - BERNADINE
Cares About Anything? - EVERYONE ELSE!!!!
The Most Artistic? - THIS ONE will BE IZYAN.. hee... love her creativity...
The Most Musical? - hmmmmm... cant think of anyone...
The One That Doesn't Shut Up? - ELAINE...ha ha... unless she's in a PMS-ing mood... hee!!!
The Loner? - NONE!!!
Gets High The Most? - ermm.. i don't know.
The act-cute? - NONE.
Acts a lot like you? - i like baby's ans.. none.. cause i'm UNIQUE!!!!
The BEST FRIEND? - AYN, PREMANI, MAY, ELAINE and BERN... hee hee...

YOU broke my heart into pieces.......

2005-08-21T14:50:00.000-07:00

yeah fuck that relationship...........
YOU said it....

i'm giving you wat you wanna...

you chose money over me...you broke your promises to me...

enjoy your job.. stay happy always...

FEELINGS

2005-08-20T23:25:00.000-07:00

For every heart that finds love
There is a heart that cries,
For every dream that is reborn
There is a dream that dies.
For every dayfilled with sun
There is a day of rain,
For every hour filled with joy
There is an hour of pain.
For every smile upon a face
There is a tear to cry,
For every fond hello you say
There is a sad goodbye.

i feel myself going thru a roller coaster of emotions... it's weird.. cause i, myself dont know the reason.. ha ha..
i dont know wat more to say...
why am i hiding myself in this shell???
why am i refusing to face reality???
I am going to Grow Up... I'm Gonna be Strong..
and after all, i cant depend on that ONLY person cause we'll be living our separate lives one day....the life where it's not gonna be abt me but abt some other Lucky pErson...
so GROW UP HARJINDER!!!!!!!!

YOU broke my heart into pieces.......

2005-08-20T14:50:00.000-07:00

yeah fuck that relationship...........
YOU said it....

i'm giving you wat you wanna...

you chose money over me...you broke your promises to me...

enjoy your job.. stay happy always...

my wonderful Moments.......

2005-08-19T19:45:00.000-07:00

and they never fail to be when i'm in school with my crazy frens-prem, bern and elaine(the craziest)..haha...

and after school when i meet baby... hee!!!

apart from that, my life is filled with nothing more but boredom.. cause it's my books that become my companions...... haiz...
being in JC is really fun but i think that the studying portion spoils it all.. ha ha...
but it's all part of life... and i've no choice since i wanna get to the UNI... hee... with baby and my crazy frens of course...
(that completes the perfect education)

lastly, i just wanna say happy 13th anniv baby....
i'm glad that things are improving btw us... hee...

Loss For Words....

2005-08-16T21:15:00.000-07:00

so many things are happening in my life... yet i dont know who to turn too....
i'm falling deeper and deeper into my emotional "depression"....
(Loss For Words).........

yeah come on... Tell us more that we're STupid ppl.... that we'll make it to NO PLace...
helloooo who's even thinking of repeating... and even IF some ppl do, i dont think that they will wanna re-enter THIS HELL!!!!!!!!
and yeah i'm motivated to PROVE these ppl WRONG....
(with stupid guides, come stupid guidance...)

I wish... I wish... I wish.....

2005-08-15T22:55:00.000-07:00

I wish that humans didnt have feelings then maybe i wont be feeling wat i'm feeling rite now... i dont really know how to describe it but it's def not a feeling of happiness...
i wish that i cld turn back time... but maybe it mite not actually be a good idea...
i wish i had the "soma pills"-"happy pills" that they had in Brave New World...
i wish that i wasnt the person that I am...then maybe things mite have been betta...
there are just so many things that i wish for... but maybe i'm actually just running away from reality... am i???
i guess so....
and in this process just hurting myself deeper and deeper...
I guess CHANGE is the big word that i'll need to learn and accept...

Remember???

2005-08-14T18:10:00.000-07:00

Remember the time...
when you trusted someone
but that someone betrayed it...

Remember the time...
when you were all alone hoping that someone will appear
but that someone was nowhere to be found..

Remember the time...
when you thought you found that someone
but it was never meant to be yours...

Remember the time..
when you thought everything ard you was true
but it turned out to be a Big Lie...

Remember the time..
when people thought that it was a success
but all you felt like was a Big Failure...

Remember the time...
when you became an object of comparison
and no one bothered abt your feelings...

i was kinda thinking abt lotsa thing last nite cause i cldn't sleep all thanks to Mr Fever.. Miss Sore Throat... and Miss Flu... (it's silly i know!!!)

today went to the doc... and yeah asked abt the letter which the hosp gave for my family doctor.. i didnt know abt my condition but now i do and i find it pretty interesting...
one of my beta cell in my red blood cell isnt functioning.. and thankfully mine isnt a major case where i'll have to undergo blood transfusion once a mth... and i can only live up to 20 or 30 yrs.. kinda scary isnt it.. then he further went to describe the situation for me in the future... i cant marry a guy who has the same case as me cause then my children will be born with 2 "useless" beta cells and this is dangerous for them...as they will have to undergo the blood transfusion thingy...
it's kinda interesting isnt it??? ha ha... but yeah very scary indeed.. i'm really really thankful that mine isnt serious as 75% of my red blood cell is functioning...

finally, i miss Baby..
miss Prem... too...bern and her silly tags or shd i say excuses... that she doesnt like Kelvin but deep deep down she does.. ha ha...

Holidays!!!

2005-08-12T19:20:00.000-07:00

Holidays are the best time in life.... but they pass so quickly....haiz...

On mon, had National Day celebrations in school.... it was ok.. pretty boring.. haiz... too much prize presentation... and the pinning of badges... so infuriating...
after that went to town with prem... and i really wanna thank the gal for walking up and down umpteen times to find sth i cld get in tamp.... ha ha... Thanks prem... love ya...

on tues... sat at home and slacked... haiz...
watched the parade... quite interesting... love the parade.... they look so so good in uniforms... hee...

Wed finally came... met baby.. hee... went to watch Charlie and Choc Factory... it's such a great movie... so cute and funny.... an awesome stress relieving movie... hee...
took neo-print again.. i love it... and baby look great on that day...
met yan,shaz and dee after that... had fun with the gals...

and that's the end of the holidays...sigh
back to school.... but school is fun with Frens like Elaine and Bern... ha ha... and of Course KAvee and May... hee
PREM was like absent for both days.... miss ya gal... lotsa...
and bern miss your teasings.... heee

Friends and More!!!!

2005-08-07T15:10:00.000-07:00

read a really interesting entry... and it's from Prem's blog... hee hee...
the type 1,2 and 3 friend.... it's so true man!!!
hey prem, i'm glad that i'm the type 3 fren to ya... i'll always be there for ya ok gal.. =) and i'm missing ya lotsa now..
and i dont always say the same things... meano!!! Prem is so mean... hee!!!!

nothing interesting happened in my life for the past few days... things have been pretty normal... school.. study... though not really studying well..

and baby and I have been arguing pretty lots lately.. maybe i have changed.. i guess so...

i cant wait for mon... gonna hang out with the gals... FINALLY!!!!
i cant wait for wed toooo... it's goonnaaa be sooooo fun with baby... hee... and i cant cant wait...

A "friend" is a gift,
a Gift to share.
A Gift from a package
MArked "handle with Care".
I want Prem, Elaine, Bern, and 17th SC
to know that you guys are one of
The BEST Gift i ever received.

moving on,(hee hee)

The Magic Of Love

Love is like magic
And it always will be.
For love still remains
Life's sweet mystery!!
Love works in ways
That are wondrous and strange
And there's nothing in life
That love cannot change!!
Love can transform
The most commonplace
Into beauty and splendor
And sweetness and grace.
Love is unselfish,
Understanding and kind,
For it sees with its heart
And not with its mind!!
Love is the answer
That everyone seeks...
Love is the language,
That every heart speaks.
Love can't be bought,
It is priceless and free,
Love, like pure magic,
Is life's sweet mystery!!

- Helen Steiner Rice -

that's all i guess for today... and tmr is celebration day in school... betta be good... =p

wat is love??

2005-07-31T18:55:00.000-07:00

watched a serial just now...
a girl controlling a guy to the max...
haha... possible in real life situations??
i dont think so..
pity the guy actually.. but he was ok with it cause all he has for that gal is LOVE...
so does Love makes one forget everything???
i guess so...

kinda going thru some stuff emotionally...
dont really know how to explain it actually...
and yeah it just got worse after reading your blog...

(quoted from b's blog)
"i tried to please you.. but it'll never be enough. where we've grown flowers out of all this time.. there's nothing more growing now except weed."

i never said that i wanted to leave ya..

all i have now is just tears flowing down my cheeks.. I'm sad.. really am..

you told me before that i'm the only gal that will tolerate your nonsense... and maybe ask yourself why do i do that???

think that i cant say more..

another chapter of my life!!!

2005-07-30T19:00:00.000-07:00

today went for some Scholarship Seminar... it was boring at first but it got interesting at the second portion-the UK's university presentation.. it was really hilarous.. enjoyed that bit.. then after tat, boredom.. so yeah Prem and I left during the tea-break, leaving Bern, Kavee and Chartan to enjoy the rest.. ha ha..

Prem and I head down to have dinner... or maybe late lunch at Funnan.. walk thru City Hall Mrt station... and we saw lotsa policemen.. it was really damn cool... they all looked great.. and guess wat saw my ex-best fren's bf.. ha ha.. he looked so funny in that uni and i think that the gun was heavier than him.. ha ha...
Prem and I were laughing abt all the silly things in the world... pretending to whisper and act suspicious.. but haiz.. of course the police wont even care cause we dont even look scary.. ha ha..

and during dinner, we were laughing once again... just cldn't stop... of course we were like bitching.. the daily gal stuff man.. hee!!!
it has been a long time since we last bitch and laugh like crazy, rite prem..
had a great time with Prem today... hee... and missing that gal already..

i think that Singapore may be an English-speaking country but some ppl's English is really bad man.. i'm not saying that mine is perfect... but at least i dont pronounce humble as "humber" and overseas as "oversee".. hee.. i'm so mean i know.. i mean like i expected a lot from that person... and the best part was that Prem was imitating that person.. so hilarous...

and this is for baby...
i love baby..
Yes i Do...
i lOve baby..
How abt you?? (baby)
hee!!!! (miss baby)

and i wanna say that i miss 17Th SC.. lotsa.. lotsa and lotsa.. friends for eternity...hee!!!

Weird!!!

2005-07-25T18:35:00.000-07:00

//editz 1850.....
i wanna thank MAY for the card.. thanks.. so sweet u know... i love the card...hee... miss ya may... thanks once again!!!
end editz//

HIST IS REPEATING ITSELF it seems!!!
weird.... and yeah the drifting begins.....
it funny isnt it...that one of us will eventually be neglected...
haiz!!!! but it's ok.. i'm kinda use to this already... how long more is it going to last... and am i gonna get affected each time it happens...

went for my check-up once again.. it's kinda irritating i wld say.. but i'm extraordinary... ha ha... the gal with something missing in my red blood cells... ha ha... i think that's wat the doc said.. i'm kinda tired listening to that.. so yeah now, i've lower blood (dont know wat) compared to others... and i'm like gonna do follow-up with my family doc... but i dont wanna waste my parents' money on this!!!
haiz....... i'm so irritated with life...

i wanna thank baby for waiting for me for nearly 45 mins and accompanying me.. i had a great time with b..thanks...

and i realise how stupid i am today... sigh!!!
kinda felt very sad!!! cause i act knew wat it was... haiz... but i was like so dumb... at least that was it seemed to baby!!!
(plz dont tell anyone ok) hush!!!!

JUST WANNA SAY!!!

2005-07-24T18:47:00.000-07:00

maybe we are beginning to drift apart AGAIN!!!

and i wanna say that i miss twinxz!!!!!!!

dont really know wat to say actually!!!!

2005-07-23T19:15:00.000-07:00

dont know wat to update about but just feel like doing so!!!

the qn i really wanna ask is if human nature is really selfish???
learnt abt it in utopian lit..
i think that it is really selfish.. cause ppl do tend to think abt themselves more than others... it's kinda interesting thinking abt all this... and that's why i love utopian lit...
can humans actually be brainwashed??
can humans be controlled??
it's scary to think that it is actually kinda possible!!!

yest had a great afternoon with B... but before that i just gotta get pissed because of some ppl and vented it on B.. sorry yeah... thanks for enduring it!!!

My mind is all ready to study but my body just feels so lazy.. but i really have to start man!!! cant delay... i'm act glad that i did some work for GP yest... gotta persevere... esp when i suck in it!!!

time for dedication!!!

What a best friend is...
by O0o0~o^/*H@yZ*^o~0o0o

You're the one that knows me best,
The one among all the rest.
The one who knows the real me,
The person no one else could see.

Without you here,
It wouldn't be the same.
I'd miss you so much,
I'd go insane.

I'll be by your side,
For whatever comes your way.
Trust me on this one,
By your side is where I'll stay.

We share many memories,
Good ones and bad,
Those memories were the best ones,
I've ever really had.

I miss the good times,
Whether it was laughter or tears.
But losing you,
Is my only fear.

There's not a day,
That I'm not thinking of you,
And how lucky I am,
To have a friend that tells me the straight out truth.

You're my best friend,
No matter what you do.
My definition of a best friend,
Is everything I see in you.

lots of hugs and kisses!!!

this is for prem, bern and elainey... thank you guys...

WhEn i fElL in l0ve wiTh y0u
by …°¤•*d0ra

There was never a night or day
Where you didn't cross my mind
I know in my heart you were the one
That took me a while to find.

I knew you were the right one
That would always make me smile
I always saw us in my dreams
Lasting all the while.

Speaking to you made me happy
My heart was filled with joy
There was never a dark day I could ever face
Thanks to Baby.

B showed me the meaning of friendship
B is now the meaning of love
B was my best friend at the start
Now B's my angel from above.

B taught me how to smile
B wiped away my tears
By each other side forever
Together hand in hand through the years.

With you I'm always smiling
You are the angel of my life
I have been blessed with love and happiness
no more sadness, tears or strife.

Thank you my love
I'll never let you down
For you are my reason
My smile no longer frowns.

this is for baby.... thanks for everything yeah...
love ya always...

(sorry that my entry for today is kinda messy.. cause as i said i didnt know wat to update on.. hee!!!)

the end of that 1 yr journey!!!

2005-07-20T18:15:00.000-07:00

yest the time which i dreaded finally arrived...
18th Student Council Investiture...
where i had to remove my badge... haiz...

i kinda have gotten over the fact that now i'll be walking ard without that gold badge... i hope that i have at least...

seeing the 18th with the badge makes me sad but at the same time, it makes me happy cause they are so proud to wear the badge and they look good with it...
once again, All The BEST ok guys...

had the dinner with the TAs in the evening.. there's nothing more to describe it than awesome... i really had lotsa fun.. seeing the 17th united once again really made that nite... we were crapping as usual... and to TAs, thank you very much for the dinner...

will really miss all this.. but i know that the 17th Friendship will last for eternity...

saw the 16th too yest.. thanks guys for coming.. really missed you guys...=)

thanks baby for the bouquet tak menjadi.. ha ha...

Tues!!! Am i READY???

2005-07-16T15:00:00.000-07:00

part of me dont wanna tues to come... but part of me wants...
i dont wanna go thru that stress anymore but i dont wanna give everything up too... haiz... but yeah let's face reality ok... hope that 18th SC will do a good job.. so yeah all the best to you guys..

on Fri, last day of official Council Day, i just had to cut my hand... i really wanna thank...

1) Baby for bringing me to the doc though b had plans!
2) Yan for borrowing $20!
2) Prem for trying to stop the blood and carrying my bag!
3) Mark, Kavee, MArcus and Alfred too...

thanks guys... 17th SC roX!!!!
and yeah i really am so happy that 17th is so close and united now!!!

and i just wanna say that i miss baby lotsa now... hee hee...

just writing a note

2005-07-10T17:45:00.000-07:00

to say that i miss so many ppl now....

1) baby
2) prem
3) may
4) elaine
5) bern
6) Twinkx
7) hijanah
8) kavee

hee hee....

replying to baby's taggie... i will try to bring out that lit student out of me soon ok... ha ha..

and to isyah... hope that your tongue isnt hurting too much now... hee hee...

and read prem's blog... her sat entry abt council... is exactly how i feel... kinda sad now... haix... it's like one last week to go... ONE last week...

YOU made my day.... =)

2005-07-04T18:20:00.000-07:00

went shopping today.... yipee... baby got me two prety tops,foundation from body shop and stationeries.... hee hee... so so fun tau...

and i got baby the bag that b wanted.... i was really happy to see the smile on b's face... made my day... hee hee...

and yeah finally saw baby... wow... and i'm missing b already.. sooo fast rite.. hee hee...

and this are the sticky prints we took today... soo nice... =)

thanks baby for buying me everything yeah... love ya lotsa...

and to prem, dont be sad anymore ok... miss ya gal... love ya too...

and to may, misss ya too... hee hee...

the song for YOU

2005-07-02T16:10:00.000-07:00

Dangerously In Love

I love you... I love you, I love you

Baby I love you, you are my life
My happiest moments weren't complete if you weren't by my side
You're my relation and connection to the sun
With you next to me, there's no darkness I can't overcome
You are my raindrops, I am the seed
With you and God who's my sunlight I'm blooming, grown so
beautifully
Baby I'm so proud, proud to be your girl
You make the confusion go all away from this cold and misty
world

I am in love with you (in love)
You set me free
I can't do this thing called life without you here with me
Cause I'm dangerously in love with you (in love)
I'll never leave
Just keep loving me the way I love you loving me

I am in love with you (in love)
You set me free
I can't do this thing called life without you here with me
Cause I'm dangerously in love with you (in love)
I'll never leave
Just keep loving me the way I love you loving me

I know you love me, love me for who I am
Cause years before I became who I am, baby you were my man
I know it ain't easy, easy loving me
I appreciate the love and dedication from you to me
Later on in my destiny I see myself having your child
I see myself being your wife and I see my whole future in your
eyes
In awe of my love for you, sometimes makes me wanna cry
Realize all of my blessings, I'm grateful to have you by my side

I am in love with you (in love)
You set me free
I can't do this thing called life without you here with me
Cause I'm dangerously in love with you (in love)
I'll never leave
Just keep loving me the way I love you loving me

Every time I see your face, my heart smiles
Every time it feels so good, it hurts sometimes
Created in this world to love, to hold, to feel, to breathe
To live you
Dangerously in love, yeah

I am in love with you (in love)
You set me free
I can't do this thing called life without you here with me
Cause I'm dangerously in love with you (in love)
I'll never leave
Just keep loving me the way I love you loving me

Dangerously (dangerously)
Dangerous, dangerously in love with you
Oh, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you
I love you.. oh yes..

baby... i miss ya....

had a great day today....

2005-06-28T23:30:00.000-07:00

hmmm let's see.... it has been a long time since i last went out with prem... and yeah i accompanied her today to get her one mth gift.. hee hee... walked ard orchard like crazy... my legs and shoulders were aching.. ha ha.... but i had lotsa fun with that gal...

first we wanted to get perfume... but found nothing good... haiz..
then went to far east, but also nothing...
then finally went to topman and she bot.... boxers... ha ha... cant believe it... but yeah... i think it's a cool gift.. ha ha...

and prem i just wanted to let ya know that i'll always be there for ya when u need me ok... hee hee...

today the twinkx met... but yeah i cldn't make it...
just wanna say that i miss u babes ok... hee hee...

and i miss baby.. havent met b for quite long... for me, it is quite long...

that's all for today i guess...
and yeah i'm so happy that this coming mon is a holiday... muahahahahaha...

school is re-opening too soon????

2005-06-26T19:05:00.000-07:00

haiz.... haiz... haiz.... more and more sighing to do...
tmr 27/6/05... school is re-opening... sooo boring... life is going to sux after this.. but maybe i'm exaggerating too much... hee hee.... not as if i didnt go to school at all during the holidays.. so yeah i'm exaggerating... i just hate waking up early in the morning.... such a lazy gal... ha ha... but yeah guess i'll get use to it soon....

ok ok.. let's stop whining now... it's getting boring in here...

for the past three days.. i have been staying at home and being a good gal.. so yeah i have nothing much to say... hee hee... life has been boring...

read prem's blog.. and it's all filled with sweetness... hee hee... that gal is sucha dearie.... and to jiv, betta treat prem nicely ok.. cause she is a great gal... and yeah prem, he sounds nice and sweet too... so yeah, a perfect couple huh... =)

guess i've got nothing much to say... i miss b now.. havent seen b for 4 days... haiz... oops i sighed again...

dont cha wish your galfren was hot like me???? (shaz's msn nick)... hee hee.. nice nick there... love that babe too... hee hee....

do i still mean anything to you??????

2005-06-22T17:50:00.000-07:00

plz ask ur heart that.... my heart has already been broken into pieces....

you cld actually throw the letter out....

how cld u do that??? just because u were angry.... did u care abt my feelings... did you???

all along i have taken all the coldness and mean-ness that u have given me.. but this time it's the ultimate.. u actually threw the letter out... i really dont know wat to say.. my heart is really broken that i wanna cry all day long.. but wat to do.. i cant.. cause i have no choice but to potray a happy face at home... i'm feeling uncomfortable... why do i have to hold back all those tears????

yeah i may have hurt u this afternoon.... i'm sorry for that...

does anger just makes you forget everything???
even my feelings????
u get angry with me at the slightest thing.. but i still bear with it... i mean like i'm not saying that i'm perfect... i have hurt you too... but i still do take into acc your feelings...like this afternoon, i hurt you but i still cried like so badly cause i knew that i hurt you... but for you anger just makes u forget me... you cld act throw the letter and that was because you were angry....

do u even act still love me..... plz ask ur heart that....

do i stillll mean anything to you????

i have to admit that i can't do without ya.... 11 mths... 11mths.... but is this how things are going to be??? your anger???

who else am i gonna lean on?
when times get rough
who's gonna talk to me on the phone
till the sun comes up
who's gonna take your place

there ain't nobody better

wat a wonderful feeling

2005-06-20T19:05:00.000-07:00

another day spent not studying....oh wat to do.. i'm such a lazy gal.. ha ha..

wateva but i had fun with my baby though we argued once again... b misunderstood me u see....haiz... but it's ok... cause the good time outshined the bad time.. hee hee....

baby was super sweet today and i had the best time of my life... thanks baby... love ya lotsa.... hee hee... and rite now i'm missing b so much...

and i cut my finger.. ouch.. so pain tau... =(

morning went for my blood test.. another ouch there... i really hate it but i have no choice... haiz....

i'm so whiny today....

and prem dont worry ok... love ya gal...miss ya too.... we didnt even go out together during the holidays =(

ok ok betta not say more cause i dont know wat i'm talking abt now...

loss for words

2005-06-11T11:20:00.000-07:00

i really dont know wat to say to ya anymore.... i really dont know... yeah maybe i have to agree with ya that things are not working out i guess... yeah i said that i'll change and yeah i'm trying... changing oneself do not happen overnite ok... but yeah to u this mite all be a lie... then u know wat.. i really have nothing to say... we have been arguing far too much that yeah it is draining the both of us.. yeah u may blame it on my attitude but why dont u see wat is the reason for our arguments... i mean like it takes two hands to clap.. i mean like i accept my fault... but it's like unfair... cause u too have a part in it... ok stop using that tone or giving that attitude.. ok i'll... but pls stop judging me watever way u wanna... yeah i know that once again it's my fault and yeah i accept the blame... i really hope that things will work out for the better cause if not i know that no matter how much love u have, it will be soon that things will break btw us.. and i dont wanna that to happen....
i really dont...

Taken from prem's blog:
To Harjinder,

for five years we were frens. sometimes best frens. sometimes not. and then we came to SR, together and we became inseperable. then, u found someone, we drifted. i felt that i didnt even know u. but now, again, after a long time, we are besties i bet we will be for a long time to come.

thanks gal... and yeah i'm glad that we are closer now... and i'm glad too that u have found ur significant other... who seems sweet... hee hee... and abt elaine... maybe u guys shd hang out one of the days and talk things out... ok.. dont worry things will get betta.. and lastly i love ya gal.. and yeah i'm missing ya... and gal enjoy yourself ok on...... dont wanna say more...

feelings.....

2005-06-09T20:05:00.000-07:00

yest had the best time with the 17th... celebrated Ms Ong's birthday.... and it was so so so fun.. love the councillors man... and i'm so going to miss council after 19th July.... thats the only thing that keeps me going in school.... i really love 17th...
u see i have curfew so yeah i was the first to leave yest.... and i felt so bad dragging prem with me... because of my UNREASONABLE dad... i mean like come on the fun only began... had an argument with him when i got back home... and he isnt talking to me... which i think it is a good thing.. ha ha.... i'm too tired.... and prem thanks for listening to my crappiness yest ok...... love ya gal.... and bianca... thanks for being a great cook.. and just to add on, she is already so part of our group... hee hee!!!

yest i was really very sad after my dad thingy... and yeah i even had the tots of.........watever i'm just too tired of my CURFEW....... UNREASONABLE CURFEW... i wanna my space... i want my life.... WHY CANT U GUYS JUST UNDERSTAND THAT???????

today had a more relaxed day.. ha ha... didnt go for lect and met baby after tat.. went to school to collect my econs stuff and Baby's service award and cert... then just slacked at kovan... it was just for a while but yeah i had a great time... always do...

as for now, haiz... just read baby's blog and kinda feeling sad... but yeah it's ok...

and yeah may, thanks for coming up with yest's idea.... it was really great... the smile on MS Ong's face and the councillors really had lotsa fun.. thanks gal.. and yeah i didnt do much ok... must thank Prem for the beautiful card and Heeru for the cake.. =)
17th rox!!!!

the best nite of my life

2005-06-04T17:50:00.000-07:00

it was the first nite of clubbing for me..... and i had great fun... with baby, yan and haikel... so yeah i'm not a clubbing virgin anymore.... hee hee. and it's the same for yan... hee hee...

ok so yeah we stayed at mt emily before heading down to club.... the duration at the hotel was fun cause yan and I were like testing our cosmetics.. and I was like i dont care i wanna yan to make up for me... and man she did a great job.. ha ha... thanks dear... the rest of the time, i was like just slacking on the bed..

then we started our clubbing journey by intending to go phuture but no we ended at the wrong place first then took a cab down to phuture... but decided to not enter as min age was 21... then was eyeing zouk but no didnt go in there either... so yeah decided to do chinablack instead.. so yeah altogether we took 3 cabs... hee hee... b was in such a big hurry and we ended up in chinablack pretty early... but watever it was, i had an awesome time dancing with b and the rest...

b and i returned to the hotel at 2 am cause i wasnt feeling well and b was tired... then yan and haikel wanted to make full use of the 15 bucks they paid so they went up to dance again.. they sneaked into the hotel at ard 3 plus... hee hee...
and i wanna thank nis cause she was the one who booked the hotel.. hee hee.. thankfully we had a place to stay...

today morning was great... had breakfast but sth bad just had to happen.. and that is b left e hp in the bus.. and yeah it's gone.. it's an ex phone.. haiz... b dont be sad anymore ok...

this is specially for baby:
dear, i had a great time with ya... i'm sorry that i was unwell though and it kinda spoil the mood... but yeah b, i feel so thankful that i have ya.. there's nothing more i can ask for... i just felt so close to ya... it was awesome... thanks for taking care of me...and dancing with ya is just the best thing on earth... haha... so yeah i wanna end it all by saying that i love ya.. really do..=)

and yeah now i'm missing prem and may lotsa....

laziness has overpower me!!!

2005-05-31T16:50:00.000-07:00

wat can i say??? suppose to be in school today but no i decided not to wake up in the morning cause i was not feeling well but mainly cause i was just too lazy... ha ha.. and yeah wat am i doing at home??? just slacking.. feel so bad man... haiz.. must really get down to work.. and be like prem who is so serious now.. gonna buy books and all.... ha ha...just love that gal man.. she's just so smart and hardworking.. and i'm missing her lotsa too.. hee hee...
prem must go to school tmr ok!!! PLZ..cause if not, i'll die of boredom... plz.. plz... plz.. ha ha...

yest went shopping with b and yeah be4 that of course went to watch star wars cause b wanted to watch it so badly... and i didnt even know anything abt that show when i entered the cinema.. ha ha... strangely but honestly, i enjoyed the show.. it's a good movie... and the "hero" is so cute... hee hee... then after that walked ard town to shop for mine and b's clothes with sofi and yan... i had lots of fun...thanks b for buying me all that i wanted.. ha ha.. sorry for causing u to go bankrupt..hee hee.. evilll me!!!

then after all the shopping, i didnt go to school.. haiz.. bad... bad me...

ok that's all for now.. and yeah b is too busy that cannot msg me... ha ha ha!!!
and i'm missing prem... and MAY... the crazy gal.. hee hee... love the 2 of u okz...

my new blog

2005-05-29T18:52:00.000-07:00

ok let's see... once again this blog isnt created by me... ha ha ha...i'm so useless i know.. hee hee... but yeah i wanna thank my special someone who did it for me... i'm like such a lazy idiot that even if i create, i will just do the first step and then give it up like i actually did before.. ha ha...

ok.. ok.. got nothing much to write actually... just cant wait to go shopping tmr with my special someone.. =)

and lastly, i'm so so in love with this blog... it's so pretty.. hee hee...